It’s Pointless To Discuss Life Decisions with Person Who Can’t See Wrong In Their Own Behavior

Benjamin Zulu is a Counseling Psychologist, Conference Speaker and, Life Coach

One lady asked what she should do because her second child is not her husband’s. That she got it by ‘mistake,’ and by mistake she meant that she took pills that didn’t work. She wasn’t remorseful about the cheating, just the fruit of the cheating.

What degree of being heartless is this? Of course, where the pregnancy came from STI’s could have resulted as well. But what about loyalty and conscience and being true to one’s promises?

How did we get here that we can go around asking for advice not to correct our wrongs but to cover them?

I told her to stop dreaming of a shortcut. The only solution is to confess and let him decide whether to stay or leave. She feared that confessing might ruin the marriage I said it was not the confession but the transgression that had ruined the trust.

If no child was involved she might confess to God and reform her ways without having to disclose to the man. But now there’s a living fruit of that deed so she must both repent before God and the husband. In any case, the guilt wa eating her up for all those years.

She wasn’t in peace and this is what those people who call on radio shows to brag about cheating don’t tell you. You can never find peace after such monstrous acts of betrayal.

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Similarly, baby mama baby daddy situations are usually a result of fornication and reckless sexual behavior. But we have normalized it so that people mention them as a matter of fact.

I recently arrived at the conclusion that it’s pointless to discuss life decisions with a person who can’t see the wrong in their own behavior. If someone asks what they should do with an irresponsible baby mama or baby daddy I’ll tell them to do exactly what they were planning to do when they decided to have sex with them. You make your bed you must lie on it.

The moment you ask people to face the fruits of their doings they say you’re judging them because their itching ears don’t want the truth.

In order to live right and in peace you have to think right. Choices have consequences and sexual choices have dire consequences. I don’t know where we began trivializing sex and making people think they can sow without reaping.

If you think cheating and premarital sex are making love, you’re thoroughly deluded. You will be knocked back to your senses in a rude shock when your actions catch up with you.

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But we are human and we all err, right? Right, and our sins are forgiven as well. But forgiveness comes after we own up and change our attitude. There can be no remission without remorse. Also, willful and habitual sin will catch up with you and you will pay more than what you ate.

‘Yet if he is caught, he must pay sevenfold.’ (Proverbs 6:31)

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